Monday, November 30, 2009


I noticed yesterday as I was washing my face in the morning, that my eyelashes are coming back! All small and thin, but there! Its almost impossible to take a picture of them, but if you want to see how awesome they are, just ask. I will totally show you.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Port Removal Completed

So, yeah. They didn't put me out. Which was not as bad as I thought it would be. I had the ear plugs and the head phones (great big ones from Skull Candy that I borrowed from Nik. Thanks Nik!!) and that worked pretty good. Here's how it went down:

My mom and I got to the hospital a little after 8:30 and were checked in right away. I expected lots of fuss and tests and what-not, but they just took my blood pressure and pricked my finger. Then they said to change from the waist up (I kept my jeans on the whole time) and then took me down for the procedure. Mom got to wait for me in the room and read my book.

I was in the same room as when I had it put in, so, you know, that was all nostalgic :). Everyone was really awesome. They were funny, and made me feel very, ok, with what was going on. I got to stay in my bed and they gave me a warm blanket (seriously the best thing about this whole thing, all the warm blankets). After they got me all swabbed and draped, I put my head phones on and tried not to listen.

The shots they gave me to numb the area were horrible!! Three of them and they all hurt so much! But that didn't last long, and after they took effect I didn't feel a thing. Only tugging and scraping. Tug, tug, tug, scrape, scrape, scrape. I didn't look, although, I thought Kersten probably would have. Seems a waste to have that going on right underneath my nose, and not take advantage, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it.

Ok, but the best part? When I could hear what the doctors and nurses were talking about, it was Alton Brown. And his turkey brine and mashed potatoes. I actually participated in that one. I think they talked about it for quite a while. It make me feel better to know they were so at ease with what was going on.

Since they didn't put me out, there was no recovery time, so when I was done, they just said, "well, have a happy Thanksgiving! Don't pick at the Dermabond!" And I have been in minimal pain ever since. It just feels like a cut. Which is what it is. And I am going back to work tomorrow. Yay.

So, to make a long story short................It was not bad at all. I would have taken that over a lot of what I had to go through this summer. And I will have an awesome scar. Well, maybe not if they did their jobs right...

Monday, November 23, 2009

Port removal scheduled

Tomorrow morning at 8:30. Only local anesthesia. Pray for me. I'm bringing ear plugs.

Scan #3

This morning, bright and early, I had another PET/CT scan over at IMC. It went as well as could be expected. I braved this one alone, and it was fine. I didn't have to worry that someone was waiting for me to finish so we could go home. It was easier to drink the contrast this time, but it did not taste any better. I went over to my mom's to hang out till I had to be at work at one. It was nice. She fed me (since I had not eaten anything since the night before) and we watched tv. I had told my manager at work that sometimes the contrast can make me sick (of the intestinal variety) and if that was the case, I did not want to have to come in to work. She was great and scheduled such that it was not necessary. But, since it had been a couple hours and nothing had happened, I went in. And, sure enough, about 20 minutes later (still 10 minutes before I was SUPPOSED to be there) I got sick. Yay. And shortly after I got in, another lady left sick, so my chances of going home are slim. I am hoping it just gets better, not worse, and that I can stick out the day. Its not fun though, let me tell you.

Friday, November 13, 2009

Happy Birthday

To my new cancer friend Amy! She turns 25 today, and only has 2 more treatments left!! I am very excited for her. Now is about when you can actually see that light at the end of the tunnel. Good luck Amy!!

(check out her blog on the right...Mike and Amy)

Tuesday, November 10, 2009


So, the week of Thanksgiving I have two appointments. One, on Monday, is for a PET/CT scan to make sure it is all where it is supposed to be. I'm not really worried about this one. It will be the 3rd PET scan I have had to have, and I now know that they are one of the easiest things associated with the cancer. But then, the next day, I have to have my port out. Now, I say HAVE TO, but I really do want it out. I don't mind getting IV's for regular stuff and I think that it would be worse to have them keep using if for my tests, and needing to have it flushed every month...**shudder**. I just don't think that anyone who has not experienced it can even fathom what that is like. And it seems like it would be such a non-event. And its not. It makes me tingly inside just thinking about it. And if I don't have the port out this month, I have to come in and have it flushed before December. And to me, its just not worth it. Just take it out.

(I just said 'and' before a bunch of those sentences. Sorry English majors)

I have recently been catching up with some of my new cancer friends. I like to talk to these women, cause they are going through exactly what I went through. And in some cases, they are going through much worse things than I endured. I have mixed feelings about some of the things we talk about. Sometimes, I look back on symptoms, or individual experiences, and I just laugh, it seems so ridiculous to have had itchy feet, or cried over losing my hair. That was so long ago now. But it is new to them. And yes, it is still hard to be bald. But I am used to it now.

I decided that I didn't want to join a support group, or see a psychiatrist early on in my treatment. I thought that it would not matter who I talked to, no one would know exactly what I was going through. Plus, my doctors and nurses told me that everything I was experiencing was normal, so what difference did it make. I now see that even just having someone to talk to who has gone through something similar eased your mind so much. I am so glad I can talk to Meg and Amy about what they are going through. I may be done with the treatments, but it is by no means behind me. The things I experienced will be a part of my life forever.

Monday, November 2, 2009


Just to let everyone know, even though I am done with treatments, I will still have a bunch of scans and stuff to do, so the updates will be sparse, but they will come. So check back at your convenience, I will let you know if anything big happens.

Thanks to everyone who follows this blog, even if you don't comment :) It has meant a lot to me and to Nik. And another thanks to everyone who came to my Chemo's over party. It was a raging success!